Mission: Ignore

OK, I find out the results of the you-know-what on Friday. I'm in a holding pattern right now. OK, actually, it's more like a clinching pattern. I'm clinched: my teeth, my stomach, my shoulders. The breathing is shallow.

I mean, sure, I am trying to play it cool. Heck, I already experienced the depression, shame and disappointment of failing once, so what's one more time? It's got to be easier to fail each time, I keep telling myself. It's the studying and taking it again that totally stinks.

Sorry I haven't written much. I've been working and trying not to think about anything other than becoming a lawn and garden care expert. When the going gets rough, that's when it's time to rethink everything and consider a career change, right? Nah. It's just part and parcel of the holding pattern my life is in right now.

In the meantime I've had some job interviews. Nothing has come of them yet. I don't really want to say much about them because it would be a job that I would love, so, like the bar, I'm trying to tell myself that I am chill about it and that it's fine if I don't get what I want. But that's the real test isn't it? I know I want the job, I say I've put all my trust in the higher power, and that I'm happy with how it all comes out. Well, I'm sure that will be put to the test here shortly.

Anyway, the boys are doing great. Nate is rabid for Thomas the Tank Engine and Aron is Mr. Creative. He pretends, play acts and has a fantastic imagination. He loves swords, his Batman utility belt and Spiderman gloves.

Nate's climbing on the couch again! Gotta motor.